We all know the drill…open up a new window in your browser and cut and paste the above address.

Time for the nominees for today’s title of “Worst Person in the World.”

The bronze, to comedian Rush Limbaugh. Now we have to admit the man is funny, but never like this. In an interview that will be in Sunday’s issue of The New York Times Magazine, comedian said this about Bill Orally:

“Somebody’s got to say it. He’s Ted Baxter.”

Comedian, I hate to say this, and even with that new $38 million a year contract that you have, but the actually phrasing is “Ted Baxter’s Evil Twin.” You know, if you only paid attention while shopping around for doctors for those blue M&M’s, maybe for opnce watch this here program or stop ignoring your friend Jabba the Hutt, whom I remember ruining your television career, so much so that when I was in Times Square last month I saw the remants of a billboard promoting “The Rush Limbaugh Television Program” on top of Toys ‘R’ Us, I thought “Wait a minute…this funnyman had a five-day-a-week sitcom of his own? Why didn’t I know that?” Anyway, if you just paid attention to what we talk about here, then you’d understand why Ted Knight is doing the one and a half twist with a jacknife into a pike position with a difficulty of 2.0 next to his headstone.

The runner-ups, the graphics department of Fox Noise Channel. On Fixed and Fiends, ex-weatherman Steve Doocy and ex-sportscaster (and it shames me to say that, having been in the toy department to say the least) Brian Kilameade attacked two members of The New York Times staff, Jacques Steinberg and Steve Radcliffe and said that they were “attack dogs”. And to make it worse, the graphics folks who took Photoshop lessons in third grade by the way, plastered their heads onto a photo of a man and his poodle. And what even makes it even worse…

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v200/NozeNuggets/fox-steinberg.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v200/NozeNuggets/fox-radcliffe.jpg

…here’s the “before and after” shots from the graphics department.

You know, it’s one thing to slam people when they don’t work for you but it’s another to use their pictures and attach them to a dog. that’s even below Fox noise to do that. Look, I know you want me to be “the face of NBC News”, and we know Captain K. Rupert Murdoch bought The Wall Street Journal to spout his views of ultra conseravatism. But knock down a respected paper like the only newspaper in America that does not have a comics section? You know what they say? “See you in the funny papers!”

But our winner…

Fox Noise’s in-house promotional department. They’re running this new campaign kissing, er, praising the fact that The O’Reilly Factor Fiction Comedy Program has a 90-month winning streak against six people who never had a number one show in their lives? A 90-month winning streak against Phil Donahue, Paula Zahn, Aaron Brown, and some guy named Olbermann? That they compare The Big Giant Head to Elvis?

Somebody at Fox Noise’s parent, NewsCorpse never told them about that group that they lovingly call “The Money Demo”, you know, about those between the ages of 25 and 54, the ones that helps pay the bills for TV shows in particular? Here’s the numbers for Tuesday, July 1st, just in case you’ve forgotten:

8 PM: Countdown, 374,000 viewers. The O’Reilly Factor (even with a guest host), 355,000 viewers.

Oh, wait, this just gets better. You know how they keep saying that Billo’s reruns at 4 AM are supposed to be better than whatever we’re airing? Here’s the numbers in that money demo at 10 PM in the evening:

Countdown rebroadcast: 268,000 viewers. A new episode of On The Record with Greta Von Sustren: 261,000 viewers! Now who’s talking about better numbers in reruns?

Fox Noise Channel’s in-house promotional department, ignoring The Money Demo to serve the wishes of K. Rupert Murdoch and Roger Ailes, today’s WORST…PERSONS…IN THE WORLD!

Lauren Bacall, San Francisco Chronicle, July 2.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/07/01/DDFA11GD8V.DTL

Keith, you know how to whistle, don’t you?

NOW: Why I am zeroing in on the enema statue you all may ask, but…..

My fair city of Phoenix, AZ, is giving Russia a run for is money as we are in the process of erecting a new and very expensive piece of public art that is supposed to be a gigantic floating cactus flower, supported by many guy wires. In the wind we had tonight, I am breathless to know if it has made it to China yet, to be part of the Olympic Opening Ceremonies.

The first time I saw this thing I thought of a gigantic lavender uterus, with cervix descending. And that is what I will always see.

My tax dollars at work.