Tie: This one. I think. The colors look all funny out there in LA.
Segue tune: Brenda Lee - Teach Me Tonight
Worst Person: Brian Kilmeade of Fixed Noise for claiming that convoy attacks in Iraq are down to the same level as in the US. It’s just that all those rockets slamming into trucks are under the news radar, so we don’t hear about them.
Blogging Tip Of the Day: It helps to click “Post” when the recap is finished. I blame the surge aliens.
In a dairy aisle somewhere in Pennsylvania, presumptive Republican nominee John McCain explains why his statements to Katie Couric - y’know, the ones left on the editing room floor - were indeed factual. “A surge” (as opposed to THE Surge) is “made up of a number of components” which can be placed in any order. I think. Tell you the truth, I watched that clip a couple of times and I swear the man was talking in circles. Concentric circles.
Keith asks Chris “Adderall” Hayes if McCain has hurt his cause with that interesting display of logic, and if the party is worried that the wheels are falling off the Straight Talk Express. Mr. Hayes says that it all depends on how well the media can explain what many people see as minutiae and well, the polls are still close so maybe the GOP isn’t ready to jump off that bridge quite yet. Our Darling Rachel thinks that the campaign is doing a disservice to their candidate, what with the lack of message discipline and all.
Speaking of the McCain campaign, they seem to have taken exception to Senator Obama’s message in the guest book at the Yad Vashem. Reacting to the phrase “never again,” a McCain aide said, “Doesn’t that strike you as inconsistent?” He was referring to a prior statement of Obama’s about keeping troops in Iraq. If the wheels aren’t coming off yet, the lug nuts are mighty loose.
That noted fan of cooked food, Chuckie T, does some analysis on the new NBC/WSJ poll. Nationally, Obama is up by 6% unless you add in third party candidates Bob Barr and Ralph Nader. Then Obama is up by 13%, but the Keith Number becomes something ridiculous like 39. Let’s hear it for the protest vote! Obama is also “in the mainstream” 60% to 45%. While McCain is seen as a safer choice, Obama seems to have more solid support.
In other news, armed chimpanzee on the lam! [insert Colbert Report graphic here] Robotic dinosaur terrorizes children! Exploding apartments! A flaming crotch! It’s pandemonium!
Finally, in tonight’s edition of “Keith’s LA Celebrity Buddies On Parade,” the charming and delightful Harry Shearer joins Mr. Olbermann. Since I am simply not equipped to give you the kind of summary of Mr. Shearer that Stef would, I shall merely direct you to the video.
Yup, the colors do look really weird out in LA, noticeably the part in Mr Olbermann’s hair, which had a distinctive deep red-purplish cast on Tuesday night, only slightly less attention grabbing last night.
I admit to a conspiracy scenario crashing around in my brain in which reporters asking Keith about Rachel’s eye shadow instead of about him caused his make up people to put far too much on her a few nights ago, which led LA make-up people who love Rachel to add some odd colorations to the underside of Keith’s hair to make that top look like a lush rug, glued on with something quite maroon.
Considering how important some of the segments have been, it is too bad to have one’s attention wander while trying to identify the purple substance and what is or is not hairline.
And, I urge everyone to see last night’s Colbert Report, which had a wonderful skewering of Bill-O, replete with Keith as, well, I do not want to give that away, just that I want one.
By Rafi's Mom on Thursday, July 24, 2008 2:08 pm | Permalink
Comments about the escaped chimpanzee, of course.
First, the person who was stupid enough not to double check the locks on the enclosures or equally stupid enough to give the chimp something that had metal in it so it could create a tool to use to pick the lock caused the problem. S/he should be shot with a a gun (tranquilizer or otherwise). Here where I’m studying chimp behavior, we must check enclosure locks at least twice and have someone else must check them as well before we can leave the enclosure. We also cannot give the chimps anything that may have a metal part that can be used for tool making (and, hence, providing an interesting diversion such as lock picking).
I watched the Oddball video a couple of times and let some experts here also review it. During the first cut, the chimp is only mildly aroused. He is pant hooting, but showing a relaxed droop-lip facial expression and fairly relaxed body posture with no display indications (i.e. his hair was not pilo erect). Of course, when the fool with the gun arrived, the chimp rightly went into high arousal and could have pulled the jerk up with the gun (I was rooting for the chimp!). He remained in high arousal on the roof until he must have been affected by the tranquilizer darts.
All of this could have easily been avoided if the people attempting to recapture him (again I was rooting for the chimp’s freedom) knew how to speak “chimpanzee” and not rely on totally inane crisis plans used during their “monkey mascot” trainings.
Had they just made themselves small and less threatening (the exact opposite of what they did on the video), perhaps extended an arm with a bent wrist (a sign of friendship and goodwill) and made breathy pants (again a sign of friendship), then thrown a few of his favorite foods, the chimp may have approached calmly on his own. Then, the keepers may have been able to take his hand and walk in a crouched posture back with him to his enclosure — something that has happened when chimps have escaped from other facilities at which the keepers know what to do in that situation.
And knowing what to do doesn’t mean running around like lunatics, waving guns Cheney-style from cars, or charging the animal with nets. Someone could get hurt, most likely the poor innocent chimpanzee!!
So next time you find an escaped chimpanzee in your backyard (hear that folks in San Bernardino), you’ll know what to do!
By Houstonian on Thursday, July 24, 2008 9:47 pm | Permalink